Eve commented on my blog a couple days ago and I am having a difficult time shaking the thought that was immediately evoked in my mind. The thought that I could be a blogging addict.
While the thought seems a bit extreme, I decided to document my time spent one morning in an effort to spot anything unusual that may be a sign of a blog junkie. The following is a typical summer morning for me as the sole author of the infamous blog Uncommon Notions:
6:00 AM - Barely conscious, rolling over in bed with fuzzy dreams quickly draining from my mind, and reality coming into sharper focus, first cognitive thought for the day is, "What can I blog about this morning?" Fall back asleep loosely creating photos with funny captions, clever anecdotes, and long-winded tell-all tales in my mind.
7:00 AM - Wake up for the second time and stumble into the shower. This part of my life has been blogged. What else?
8:00 AM - Check email and then saunter to the kitchen to pour cold cereal for anyone that will get up. Usually only D1, D2 and D3. Maybe I could I blog on cold cereal? Nope, been there done that too.
9:00 AM - Finish checking email, read some blogs.
9:45 AM - Start to panic. Freak! What will I write about?
9:55 AM - Suddenly, get a blogtastic idea for a Very Funny Blog!
10:00 AM - Begin writing Very Funny Blog.
10:10 AM - Quickly switch computer screen from Very Funny Blog to QuickBooks when DH comes back home unexpectedly. Assure him I'll have his accounting numbers ready by the end of the day.
10:12 AM - Switch back to Very Funny Blog as soon as front door is heard closing.
10:15 AM - Type very lightly while listening to my sister on phone about something or whatever. Vow to self to move quieter keyboard into office from bedroom computer so this will not be an issue in the future.
10:18 AM - Pinch baby so she will cry. Terminate phone conversation with sister early on behalf of crying baby.
10:19 AM - Call D1 into the office to take care of crying baby.
10:20 AM - Rewrite Very Funny Blog. Delete half my verbose wording, and edit misspellings and misuse of words.
10:25 AM - Begin to wish I had paid more attention to Ms. Wiltsie during 11th grade English teaching us when to use who versus whom. Briefly consider blogging about my English teacher happily stuck in the 60's.
10:27 AM - Wonder whether or not to underline a title, italicize the title or put said title in quotes. Double think other critical yet basic grammar lessons.
10:29 AM - Repeatedly read Very Funny Blog making small changes with each pass through.
10:38 AM - Reread Very Funny Blog just to make sure there are no "just"s in there. Just for Bart's sake and no one else's.
10:40 AM - Lightly pound desk in laughter. Smile at how incredibly witty I am. Reread Very Funny Blog for the 27th time and make more minor edits.
10:43 AM - Find a much funnier word for an overused word in Very Funny Blog at Thesaurus.com. Congratulate myself for being so resourceful to do in-depth research for Very Funny Blog.
10:45 AM - Begin process of finding the Perfect Picture for Very Funny Blog. Peruse personal photos folder. Consider taking original photo (David would be so proud). Do not consider drawing or painting Perfect Picture like McGlinch or Chewy. Decide to search via Google Images and steal Perfect Picture instead.
11:15 AM - Publish Very Funny Blog with Perfect Picture.
11:16 AM - Click [View Blog]
11:17 AM - Admire Perfect Picture and reread Very Funny Blog again. Chuckle at Very Funny Blog's clever humor. Wonder how many people will appreciate hidden pun in Very Funny Blog.
11:19 AM - Find typo in Very Funny Blog!
11:20 AM - Edit Very Funny Blog. Reread two more times and republish.
11:25 AM - Click [View Blog]
11:26 AM - Pause and once again admire Perfect Picture and start to reread Very Funny Blog for the 31st time. Laugh out loud at Very Funny Blog's well contrived humor.
11:29 AM - Smile at the completed work of Very Funny Blog.
11:30 AM - Refresh blog page and notice there are no comments yet.
11:32 AM - Trying to hide disappointment, check email to see if the comments magically appear in my Inbox before appearing on the blog. Notice no comments, only one email from Aeropostale inviting me to their Sizzling Summer Sale.
11:34 AM - Refresh blog page again. Still no comments on Very Funny Blog.
11:37 AM - Switch over load of laundry and change baby's diaper.
11:55 AM - Check email for Very Funny Blog comments. Click [Send/Receive]. Watch computer think. Will it find Very Funny Blog comments? Send/Receive is complete. No new messages.
11:58 AM - Wonder what on earth people have to do that could possibly be better than reading and commenting on Very Funny Blog.
12:00 NOON - Skulk into kitchen to make a meal that will serve simultaneously as lunch for D1, D2 and D3 as well as breakfast for S1 and S2.
Sounds healthy and normal to me. Don't you think?
While the thought seems a bit extreme, I decided to document my time spent one morning in an effort to spot anything unusual that may be a sign of a blog junkie. The following is a typical summer morning for me as the sole author of the infamous blog Uncommon Notions:
6:00 AM - Barely conscious, rolling over in bed with fuzzy dreams quickly draining from my mind, and reality coming into sharper focus, first cognitive thought for the day is, "What can I blog about this morning?" Fall back asleep loosely creating photos with funny captions, clever anecdotes, and long-winded tell-all tales in my mind.
7:00 AM - Wake up for the second time and stumble into the shower. This part of my life has been blogged. What else?
8:00 AM - Check email and then saunter to the kitchen to pour cold cereal for anyone that will get up. Usually only D1, D2 and D3. Maybe I could I blog on cold cereal? Nope, been there done that too.
9:00 AM - Finish checking email, read some blogs.
9:45 AM - Start to panic. Freak! What will I write about?
9:55 AM - Suddenly, get a blogtastic idea for a Very Funny Blog!
10:00 AM - Begin writing Very Funny Blog.
10:10 AM - Quickly switch computer screen from Very Funny Blog to QuickBooks when DH comes back home unexpectedly. Assure him I'll have his accounting numbers ready by the end of the day.
10:12 AM - Switch back to Very Funny Blog as soon as front door is heard closing.
10:15 AM - Type very lightly while listening to my sister on phone about something or whatever. Vow to self to move quieter keyboard into office from bedroom computer so this will not be an issue in the future.
10:18 AM - Pinch baby so she will cry. Terminate phone conversation with sister early on behalf of crying baby.
10:19 AM - Call D1 into the office to take care of crying baby.
10:20 AM - Rewrite Very Funny Blog. Delete half my verbose wording, and edit misspellings and misuse of words.
10:25 AM - Begin to wish I had paid more attention to Ms. Wiltsie during 11th grade English teaching us when to use who versus whom. Briefly consider blogging about my English teacher happily stuck in the 60's.
10:27 AM - Wonder whether or not to underline a title, italicize the title or put said title in quotes. Double think other critical yet basic grammar lessons.
10:29 AM - Repeatedly read Very Funny Blog making small changes with each pass through.
10:38 AM - Reread Very Funny Blog just to make sure there are no "just"s in there. Just for Bart's sake and no one else's.
10:40 AM - Lightly pound desk in laughter. Smile at how incredibly witty I am. Reread Very Funny Blog for the 27th time and make more minor edits.
10:43 AM - Find a much funnier word for an overused word in Very Funny Blog at Thesaurus.com. Congratulate myself for being so resourceful to do in-depth research for Very Funny Blog.
10:45 AM - Begin process of finding the Perfect Picture for Very Funny Blog. Peruse personal photos folder. Consider taking original photo (David would be so proud). Do not consider drawing or painting Perfect Picture like McGlinch or Chewy. Decide to search via Google Images and steal Perfect Picture instead.
11:15 AM - Publish Very Funny Blog with Perfect Picture.
11:16 AM - Click [View Blog]
11:17 AM - Admire Perfect Picture and reread Very Funny Blog again. Chuckle at Very Funny Blog's clever humor. Wonder how many people will appreciate hidden pun in Very Funny Blog.
11:19 AM - Find typo in Very Funny Blog!
11:20 AM - Edit Very Funny Blog. Reread two more times and republish.
11:25 AM - Click [View Blog]
11:26 AM - Pause and once again admire Perfect Picture and start to reread Very Funny Blog for the 31st time. Laugh out loud at Very Funny Blog's well contrived humor.
11:29 AM - Smile at the completed work of Very Funny Blog.
11:30 AM - Refresh blog page and notice there are no comments yet.
11:32 AM - Trying to hide disappointment, check email to see if the comments magically appear in my Inbox before appearing on the blog. Notice no comments, only one email from Aeropostale inviting me to their Sizzling Summer Sale.
11:34 AM - Refresh blog page again. Still no comments on Very Funny Blog.
11:37 AM - Switch over load of laundry and change baby's diaper.
11:55 AM - Check email for Very Funny Blog comments. Click [Send/Receive]. Watch computer think. Will it find Very Funny Blog comments? Send/Receive is complete. No new messages.
11:58 AM - Wonder what on earth people have to do that could possibly be better than reading and commenting on Very Funny Blog.
12:00 NOON - Skulk into kitchen to make a meal that will serve simultaneously as lunch for D1, D2 and D3 as well as breakfast for S1 and S2.
Sounds healthy and normal to me. Don't you think?
Posts
Debbie, that is so funny and I want you to know that this is all of your fault for getting me into this Blog thing that I am now doing. I agree, it sounds healthy and normal to me too.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very, very Funny Blog! One to print out and hang on the fridge.
ReplyDeleteHmmm... maybe you should consider a proper diagnosis.
ReplyDeleteIt's so refreshing to know that somebody else pinches their babies. I'm kidding--they're too big to pinch, I whack 'em with a boat oar.
Joanne,
ReplyDeleteHappy to pass on such a fun addiction. and you are doing so well with it too!
Chewy,
ReplyDeleteFlattery will get you everywhere.
Craver,
ReplyDeleteSupposedly I am 81% addicted. I guess that leaves room for improvement at least.
It is fun to have such a talented Grand Daughter.
ReplyDeleteI cannot understand why you get so few comments
Hi Debbie,
ReplyDeleteYou win today's gold ERA (Eminently Readable Award). You have a wonderful style and you take us into your world in a warm, welcoming manner.
We laugh WITH you, not at you.
You speak for all bloggers with this one. No, you're not addicted. You're committed to blogging, and that's very different from being addicted to it.
Did you get the accounting done? And more to the point, if you ever want help with who and whom and your old teacher won't take your calls, you can call/ email/ SMS me any time.
I agree with Chewy. This is one to be put on the fridge, with suitably strong cow magnets!
See - I never forget!
Thanks for saying this would not have been a blog without my exhortations. But you are too talented a writer NOT to be blogging.
However, have a look at some of your layouts from three months ago and you'll see just how the new look with pictures and other images, gives a great new dimension to your work.
Next assignment, Debbie - you are going to write that book/ novel you've always dreamed about.
Okay? Let's get under way ....
Cheers
David
10:38 AM - Reread Very Funny Blog just to make sure there are no "just"s in there. Just for Bart's sake and no one else's.
ReplyDeleteYou did that on purpose.
Grandpa,
ReplyDeleteI am guessing my talent has been inherited from you and Grandma.
David,
ReplyDeleteYes, the accounting is done. Well done for the day. As done as it ever can be - there will always be more tomorrow.
Thank you for all the encouragment!
Bart -
ReplyDeleteYou are on to me. There is no pulling the wool over your eyes.
I love it... although you forgot to mention the time spent checking stats, or is that just me? I do like to see where people are coming from.
ReplyDelete"Begin to wish I had paid more attention to Ms. Wiltsie during 11th grade English teaching us when to use who versus whom."
Have you seen www.dailywritingtips.com? It's one of my favorite blogs, and they even have a who/whom post!
Tell your grandpa you get tons of comments compared to me!
ReplyDeleteAnd Deb, don't pinch the baby :)
Just kidding - I too think in blog terms. I'm always writing posts in my head. In my head, they're witty, articulate, very funny and of course, heavily commented. On screen, they're not quite so.
Oh my goodness, you could be a fly on the wall over at my place - this post is too far too spookily acurate for comfort (except for the theasauris bit - I take pride in using simple language, and in not being able to spell for toffee - oh, alright, I'm just plain lazy).
ReplyDeleteWonderful read, made me laugh out loud (still am).
Stacy,
ReplyDeleteI have had my site tracked by Google Analytics. I guess I coudl add checking that to my list of unbreakable habits! Thanks for the www.dailywritingtips.com site!
Abi-
ReplyDeleteI'll tell Grandpa, Of course, he could comment more often if he is so concerned!
Shrink -
ReplyDeleteScary isn't it? That we could all be so much alike. Or that I could be that fly on your wall. Which is it anyway?
Deb,
ReplyDeleteSo glad I can inspire a post for you :)
Whenever something funny or exciting happen, I always blurt, "I've got to post that on my blog!". My hubby gets so irked at me
Your do a great job of crafting your own word-pictures. keep up the good stuff.
ReplyDeleteEve,
ReplyDeleteSometimes my sisters will be telling me something and they'll stop cold. "You aren't going to blog this are you?" they'll ask tentatively.
McGlinch,
ReplyDeleteThanks! I do admire (covet) your talent though.
Daily Blog Tips has a link to a quiz, How Addicted to Blogging Are You? I thought you would enjoy it!
ReplyDeletehttp://mingle2.com/blog-addiction
ohhh....debG!! You've been in my world haven't you? The publishing, the finding spelling/grammar errors/the fixing/the republishing/the waiting for comments/the disappointment at the lack of/etc, etc, etc.
ReplyDeleteVery Funny!
Stacy -
ReplyDeleteThanks for the link. Exactly what I needed - absolute confirmation of my illness.
b.-
ReplyDeleteWe are all alike. How pathetic!
uh-huh!
ReplyDeleteOne of my freshman posts was about blogging in my sleep.
I know exactly what you mean.
Compulsive,
ReplyDeleteWow, ...in your sleep... does that go beyond addiction?
Deborah - some self promotion here, but this post got me thinking, and we need a 'top 7 signs' - the top 7 signs that you're addicted to blogging.
ReplyDeleteCan you please link to my post on this and contribute?
I think we can get a great list going!!!
Cheers!
"11:58 AM - Wonder what on earth people have to do that could possibly be better than reading and commenting on Very Funny Blog."
ReplyDeleteROFL!!
simply fantastically hilarious post!
honoured to blogroll you.
cheers
rk
Your sister Christine has been sharing bits of your blogs with me for some time and I finally checked it out and LOVE IT! I am new to blogging but am already an addict. Today I am forcing myself to get other "more important" things done before I post a new blog, so when I couldn't resist the computer anymore I read yours! You hit the nail on the head!
ReplyDeleteOzlady,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry I never contributed to your post. You caught me in the middle of my long vacation from blogging. Your post was terrific though and clever!
rk,
ReplyDeleteYou are awesome thanks for the blog roll. Wow!
Michal,
ReplyDeleteGood luck with the more important things!